Change, Trauma and Uncertainty

"Your life is a sacred journey. It is about change, growth, discovery, movement, transformation, continuously expanding your vision of what is possible, stretching your soul, learning to see clearly and deeply, listening to your intuition, and taking courageous challenges at every step along the way. You are on the path... exactly where you are meant to be right now... and from here, you can only go forward, shaping your life story into a magnificent tale of triumph, of healing, of courage, of beauty, of wisdom, of power, of dignity, and of love." - Caroline Adams


For some of you, this may be the first time ever reading my blog. For others, hello again! So grateful to be back writing on the interwebs.

Have you ever caught yourself staring off into the big sky, wondering "how in the world did I get here?" That's been me these last couple of weeks. Raise your hand if you've been there.

The waves of change came barreling down from behind me, out of nowhere. Leaving me feeling washed up, lost, and completely out of my element. With every rise, there is a fall. Sometimes, life likes to serve you a giant wave-like wake up call. With these waves, I believe, comes a new beginning. 

You may or may not relate, but I find that we spend a lot of our life trying to control every outcome possible. It could be anything from health and family to jobs and everyday choices. We think we are the puppeteer to our story, holding the strings to what happens next. Let me serve some truth: I find that it becomes increasingly obvious during a traumatic event or season of change, that we come face to face with the reality that the control we thought we once had over our life was never really there. I thought if I was a safe driver, obeyed all the rules, never got a ticket, and stayed vigilant on the road that nothing bad would ever happen. I found out very fast that this was never true. In the blink of an eye, everything changes. So, what's the answer? Do we truly have control of everything that happens in our life?  My answer from my personal experience - no. Most aspects of our life are out of our jurisdiction. Life ebbs & flows, and maybe life would be less of a struggle if we stopped trying to swim against the crashing waves and surrender to current. This is a hard concept to grasp, and nor is it a once-size-fits-all concept. The true test is what we do in the moments of change, new beginnings, and trauma. WE ANSWER IT. 


Right here, right now, is where you're supposed to be.


What I've Learned: 

WHEN LIFE IS HARD, STAY SOFT

What do I mean by staying soft? Well, be gentle with yourself on all levels. The way you speak to yourself, your movement, your breath. Nurture yourself through this process so that you can approach each day with some form of clarity, and re-energize you soul.


YOUR BREATH WILL LIGHT YOUR WAY BACK HOME

Before every inhale, there is an exhale. Breathing has to be one of the most powerful tools we have as humans. Not only does it help calm our nervous system, relax our body, re-connect the mind, and bring back a sense of balance; it brings you back home to yourself. It creates a sense of security within our being, that may, at times, feel distant. 

 

DEEP BELLY BREATHING

Place one hand on the lower belly. After a few soft rotations, on your next inhale, fill the bowl of the pelvis and lower belly. Notice subtle life and waves of breath moving with you, nourishing your body. Let it float up to the ribs and depths of the chest. On your exhale, softly draw the wave back down your body. Chest, ribs, and belly fall, expanding and grounding down into the Earth. You are home, safe and secure. 

Try and repeat this 10x or more. 


MOVE TO FEEL AGAIN

Movement is expression. It's a way to express or release our story and emotions when we don't have the energy or need to say it aloud. This allows us to come home and experience a deeper connection with ourselves. Yoga can help bring this practice to life. 



PRESENT MOMENT

Shifting our focus to the present moment can be a freeing experience. I find that during times of change, it can feel as though we're worrying about the future or reflecting on the past. All too often, our thoughts consume us. We dwell in the pain and fear and don't see a way out.  So, how do you tune in to the present moment? Personally, my breath is a wonderful way to anchor my monkey mind. I also take walks in nature. Simply take five minutes to close your eyes, sit with yourself, and notice what arises.


SIT WITH YOUR EMOTIONAL SELF

Quite simply, the act of sitting. Resist the urge of holding it all in, pushing it away, ignoring it, and notice how you feel from a kind, non-judgemental place. From there, we can create compassion towards ourselves, giving ourselves permission to feel again. 

Observe, accept, and focus on the now. 


LET GO OF ATTACHMENT

I love these three inquiries from Deepak Chopra. This practice helps us release the hold we have on the world around us. Stepping into the unknown with open arms is a process, but once embraced, it can release a lot of struggle in our life. 

1. Today I will commit myself to detachment. I will allow myself and those around me the freedom to be as they are. I will not rigidly impose my idea of how things should be. I will not force solutions on problems, thereby creating new problems. I will participate in everything with detached involvement.

2. Today I will factor in uncertainty as an essential ingredient of my experience. In my willingness to accept uncertainty, solutions will spontaneously emerge out of the problem, out of the confusion, disorder, and chaos. The more uncertain things seem to be, the more secure I will feel, because uncertainty is my path to freedom. Through the wisdom of uncertainty, I will find my security.

3. I will step into the field of all possibilities and anticipate the excitement that can occur when I remain open to an infinity of choices. When I step into the field of all possibilities, I will experience all the fun, adventure, magic, and mystery of life.



SELF LOVE

Creating a ritual of self love re-kindles the connection to ourselves. Massaging your own feet, eating food that nourishes your body, creating boundaries, taking a warm bath, using essential oils to calm your spirit, choosing words that uplift your soul. There are so many life-chasing habits. Create your own love ritual and make a vow to yourself - you are worthy of love. 

 

EVERY DAY IS A NEW DAY, A NEW OPPORTUNITY

This has to be one of the most powerful things we can say to ourselves each morning. 

"TODAY IS A FRESH START."

Remove the heaviness of yesterday. Today is a blank canvas and you hold the paint brush to what you create. Find gratitude for this moment, the Earth that supports your being, and the breath that moves freely within you and around you. No matter how hard life gets, there is always light and there is always beauty to be found. 


Peace begins with you.

I hope this blog is of service to some.

Feel free to share these words with someone who needs it!

If you feel the need to share your experiences comment down below.

 

Much gratitude, Caroline Jane